The Real Reason You’re Burned Out (And It’s Not Just Your Job)
- Asi Efros / Create Your Dream Life
- Jul 9, 2025
- 6 min read
Updated: Jul 11, 2025
Why I wrote this post?
The reason I’m writing this — and the reason I’m now living the most aligned and fulfilling chapter of my life — is because of the burnout I experienced during the last 10 years of my 30-year career in the fashion industry, working in high-pressure creative roles.
It took me a full decade to finally take the steps to dig myself out of emotional exhaustion and begin my burnout recovery journey.
The good news? You don’t have to wait that long.
This article will take you through the full picture — from recognizing the symptoms of burnout, to understanding its root causes, and finally, to actionable strategies for recovery.
So, if you feel tired, unmotivated, snapping at people, and wondering if something’s wrong with you. It’s not because you are lazy, and it’s not just your job. Let’s explore the deeper causes of burnout — and how to begin recovering.
The Classic Story of Burnout
So, what are the real reason you’re burned out? When most people talk about burnout, they’re usually describing something that sounds pretty familiar: Too many hours. Too much pressure. Not enough space to breathe. You’re juggling impossible deadlines, fielding unrealistic expectations, trying to please a demanding boss or team, and constantly pushing yourself to perform.
At first, you might call it stress. You tell yourself you just need a weekend off, a better routine, a day in a spa, a massage, maybe even a new job. But then the exhaustion doesn’t go away. The brain fog lingers. You start snapping at people you care about. You wake up tired, lose your motivation, stay up until 2:00 am vegetating in front of TV, feel too tired to enjoy the weekends, and the work that once lit you up now feels heavy or meaningless.
Here are some of the most common burnout symptoms people experience:
Constant fatigue, even after rest
Trouble focusing or remembering things (brain fog)
Emotional numbness or detachment
Low energy and motivation
Irritability or mood swings
Loss of joy or passion in work and life
Feeling like you're always "on edge" or behind
These signs are easy to miss at first — or dismiss as being part of a “busy season.” But over time, this kind of job stress chip away at your emotional well-being, your health, and your sense of self.
Burnout isn’t just about being overworked. It’s about being overextended, under-supported, and disconnected from what really matters to you.
National Library of Medicine: Burnout phenomenon: neurophysiological factors, clinical features, and aspects of management
What’s Really Happening Beneath the Surface
Despite what we often hear, burnout isn’t just about doing too much — it’s about chronic misalignment.
I spent years accepting high-powered roles: managing hundreds of millions in revenue, overseeing 22 accounts in one company and 36 licenses in another. I convinced myself this was what I was supposed to do to provide for my family — that this was the measure of my worth.
But little by little, it all began to feel like too much. I rarely spent time outside during the week. I couldn’t catch my thoughts, let alone hear my own desires. I remember one morning, sitting in a cab en route to a corporate meeting in Toronto, ordering flowers for my grandmother’s funeral in California. In that moment, the goal of supplying every American with the perfect Christmas pajamas suddenly felt far from important.
Every morning, as I veered onto the highway on my way to work, I would watch women power-walking around the park — and envy them. Deep down, I craved to be that woman.
This is the truth about burnout:It’s not just the workload — it’s saying “yes” when you mean “no.”It’s working in a role that drains you. It’s hiding parts of yourself to fit in. It’s not feeling safe to slow down.
This kind of chronic misalignment doesn’t just wear on your emotions — it sends your nervous system into a constant state of fight, flight, or freeze. Your body starts living in a loop of low-grade, unrelenting stress. Over time, this nervous system overload can lead to emotional exhaustion, physical fatigue, and even serious health conditions.
Burnout isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s a signal that you’ve been running on empty — disconnected from your truth for too long.
National Library of Medicine: Neurobiological and Systemic Effects of Chronic Stress
by Bruce S McEwen
Why Time Off Doesn’t Fix It
When burnout hits, the first instinct is often to take a break. A long weekend. A vacation. Maybe even a sabbatical. And for a while, it helps. You feel lighter. You can breathe again. But then Monday rolls around, and the dread creeps back in.
That’s because burnout isn’t something you can solve with rest alone — not when the core issue is misalignment.
If your daily life, work, or relationships are out of sync with your core values, time off becomes a temporary bandage. You return to the same patterns, the same expectations, the same pressure to perform — and your nervous system picks up exactly where it left off.
Real burnout recovery doesn’t come from stepping away from your life. It comes from stepping into it — with clarity and a new level of honesty about what you want and what you’re no longer willing to tolerate.
It requires:
Time for silence, stillness, and solitude — creating space to feel, think, and be kind to yourself
Gaining clarity on what truly matters to you right now: what brings you joy, what and who you allow into your life, and what gives you a sense of purpose
Rebuilding your nervous system’s sense of safety — finding what brings you peace and sparks creativity
And redefining what success looks like — on your own terms
Burnout isn’t just about rest. It’s about realignment. And that’s what sets the healing process apart from just “taking a break.”
National Library of Medicine: Thriving, Not Just Surviving: Recognizing Burnout and Simple Tips to Start Feeling Better
By Margaret Leddy
The Path to Real Recovery — Practical first steps:
Learn your nervous system patterns by listening to your body.
Yes — our brilliantly intelligent bodies respond to negative stimuli long before our brains catch up. Your body will tell you what it likes and what it doesn’t by creating tension, discomfort, or even pain. I remember my neck hurting for years, and I used to treat it with frequent visits to the chiropractor — until I realized the pain was my body mirroring the resentment I felt toward my job.
Reconnect with what brings you joy or energy.
Take a few minutes to remember what you absolutely love doing — a hobby, an activity, or a creative practice that puts you in flow… where time disappears and your mind quiets. Think about the people who lift your energy just by being around them. These are the people to invite in and spend more time with. Joyful activities and nourishing connections flood your body with oxytocin — the hormone of love and bonding — which heals and protects your nervous system.
Set aligned boundaries.
Every time you say “yes” to something, you’re saying “no” to a hundred other possibilities. It’s easy to fall into the false-positive habit of saying yes to everything just to be liked or avoid conflict. But instead of chasing approval, choose respect. Creating clear, kind boundaries — around your time, energy, and space — is not only essential for burnout recovery, it’s a lifelong skill that transforms how you live and relate.
Get support that helps you shift, not just survive.
In the midst of burnout, emotions often run high — because you’re in it. You’re living it. That’s why having someone who can hold space for you — who isn’t emotionally entangled in your day-to-day — can be a powerful lifeline. Someone who can hear you fully, reflect with compassion, and help you find your next step.
This is where coaching can make all the difference — offering a safe, supportive space to rediscover your needs, reset your pace, and rebuild your life with intention.
You’re Not Broken — You’re Just Disconnected from Yourself
Burnout doesn’t mean you’re weak, broken, or incapable. It means you’ve been strong for too long in a system — or a life — that wasn’t aligned with who you truly are.
It’s not a flaw in your personality.
It’s a signal from your soul.
You may have spent years taking care of everyone else, working harder and pushing through — thinking that success, security, or self-worth had to be earned through sacrifice. But at some point, your body and spirit will say: “No more.”
And that moment isn’t the end — it’s the beginning.
The beginning;
-of coming home to yourself.
-of listening, not forcing.
-of choosing peace over pressure.
-of rewriting the rules based on what feels true, loving, and alive.
You don’t need to be fixed.
You need space to remember who you are.
If this post resonated with you, it’s not a coincidence. You’re here because some part of you is ready — ready to rest, reset, and realign.
I’d love to talk with you.
Book a free 15-minute call to explore where you are and where you truly want to go HERE.
You don’t have to do it alone.
CREATE YOUR DREAM LIFE, CAREER & BUSINESS — one aligned step at a time
Cover Photo by Hernan Sanchez on Unsplash
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